Monday, December 05, 2005

It's all on Literary Mama

For anyone who hasn't seen the whole dust up, it's all up now at Literary Mama's blog, and there are some very thoughtful responses to the whole thing. I've seen it cited elsewhere on the blogosphere, and apparently I'm not the only one who was attacked by the author in question. Thanks to everyone who's been so supportive. When I first found out about all this, it felt like the first time I'd ever been attacked so harshly. After about a day had passed, I realized that back when I was an academic, such attacks were much more frequent, and were always thought of as part of the normal course of events, as "what one does" when you don't like someone's writing or a paper they'e just presented. You attack them head on, and then informally leak all sorts of personal meanness to the grapevine. What a lovely world it is. I guess I had just repressed all that. No wonder I left fulltime academe when I had the chance...

And my last point before moving on: there's such irony in being attacked as a weird internet feminist who writes about her roofers, when my blog is one of the least personal mom-blog around? I write about so little that's really persona--I protect my daughter's privacy voraciously--and to her dismay--and you never read here about arguments with my husband, or even who he is. I struggle deeply with finding a writing voice that can be personal and political, warm and angry and analytic all at the same time. There you have it. My last musing.

But more to the point of motherhood and work now:

When do we find more positive and hopeful ways of having a conversation about motherhood and family life?

On my radar: we've found a possible sponsor for MotherTalks around the country, and as details come out, I'll let everyone know. And we'll work on preparing some "how to create MotherTalk" materials, so that anyone who wakes up one morning and says, hey, I'd love to invite a bunch of moms over some evening to talk about real issues, how do I do that? might have a clear set of easy-to-follow instructions. So readers and friends, start thinking about this-you'll be among the first we ask!

And the personal update: roofers are still here, amazingly. snow is on the way. i'm nine days away from the official due date (is it too late to have one of those cutesy online due date counters? I guess so). and while last time I had four months off before delivery, this time it seems like I'm working up to the time the baby arrives. life's like that.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

I hope the bruise on your chin is fading fast. Here's my spin on the whole exchange -- Linda Hirshman just did all of us on the frontline of the Mothers Movement a HUGE favor. She's angered a whole heckuva lot of mamas who are hopefully now going to attend the next MotherTalk, join their local Mothers & More chapter, discuss flexible schedules with their employers, or write a letter to their representatives. Those quiet mother-feminists, angered by her viewpoint, might now have the fuel they need to raise their voices. Her judgement will translate into mobilization and revolution.

Keep up the great work that you do, Miriam, because we're all benefitting from it.

Anonymous said...

I don't have any children - but I must say I agree with your philosophy regarding the family. To me, a family is a cohesive unit - whatever the makeup; and it would be so nice if everyone valued children, and included them in every aspect of life in our world. Me - I love kids. Love being around families with children. Don't have a problem with children in the work place. I wish more emphasis were given to supporting men and women with children - we pay lip service; but that’s about all, and I think everyone suffers as a result. Good blog.